Page 77 & 78 of 365.


– Page 77 of 365. –


Saturday. Woke up with a bad headache.

Had a long day in church today. A lot of meetings and a few people in different ministries are stepping down.

I know it’s phase where people have to go through but… it’s just too many people and all at the same time. However, my night did get better having supper with the usual gems.

I have no idea why but that particular shop really turns me off with their food. Don’t get me wrong, they’re all good. The food looks tasty although it’s drowned in oil but it does appeal to the rest.

Either that or I didn’t quite have the appetite. Still, I really want to thank God for these people. They’ve been a huge blessing in my life, and of course, a great source of joy every weekend. 🙂



As always, pastor L.K.’s sermons are so powerful.

With this two point sermon, it indicates that the crucified life is absolute and extreme. It has come to point where being dedicated and committed is not enough. You need to have a crucified life.

The one thing that really kept ringing in my head was the as forth mentioned,

“We have to issue our own death warrant, that is our association with Jesus Christ, and die to yourself.”

I was like. That’s really true. It doesn’t matter if God gives you the ultimate formula to have a crucified life to live as an extreme disciple when you do not take that first step. That first step to die, in self and issue that death warrant.

This “warrant” is not a short-term contract. It’s a lifetime contract.

Have I issued mine? Good question. The answer is no.

However, I’m prepping for it. I don’t want to take it and give it up halfway because I “lost passion” or “got tired”. I want to make sure that I’m ready for this because this death warrant is going to be the one that lasts.

It may take some time, but I want to make sure that I do not give up halfway. 🙂



– Page 78 of 365. –


19th March, Sunday. 1400.

Today is Smith’s final memorial service. It was a restless day.

Now I’m not close to Smith. I do not know how to deliver the most touching message to someone that I am not frequently in contact with.

But I do know what he taught us through his journey. His faith, his trust in God even during times of despair and pain. His reflection of his earthly and heavenly Father. He is, a strong fighter.

That young gentleman who greeted with much enthusiasm at the entrance of Teens Xcite did shock me last year. He had a warm smile and carried a beautiful glow. I even remembered last year’s Xcite Camp, I was speaking to his brother about meeting Smith and hanging out with him.


19th March, Sunday. 2000.

Everyone took their seats. I’m not gonna lie, that was a beautiful picture of Smith right there.

Time passed so fast as best friends and family members shared their dearest words about this godly warrior. Even at his final days, he spurred to reach out to the patients in the opposite beds of the ward.


I looked at my friends and I thought, if I were to die anytime soon, would I be able to do all that? Nope. The strength and faith he had for God is remarkable. But the lesson, the message he left for us is so powerful.

Personally, what he left for us really impacted me a lot. Smith, thank you. I’m really learning how to cherish. You really demonstrated so proudly what compassion and love is.

Enjoy the beautiful pastures and the everlasting joy up there bro. Your life, we celebrate.

Kenley Ariel.



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